Overcoming the Illusion of Fear: A 3 Step Process

Fear is a very powerful force in our lives. How many decisions do you make based on fear? How many times do you let the fear of what others will think – the fear of failure – the fear of success – the fear of poverty – get in your way of doing what you really want to do?

I have come up with a way to deal with my own personal fears and I thought this would be a good time to share it with you. I have a little three step process that I like to use when I realize that a fear is getting in the way. Maybe you can try out these steps and see if they work for you!

Step 1: Identify Fear

To overcome a fear you first have to identify that a fear actually exists. Many times these fears may be unconscious and you don’t even realize that they are getting in your way. Did you just make a decision because you thought it was the best way or because you were afraid of what your mother would say? 

Identifying that a fear exists means you may have to take a step back and really analyze what is going on in your life. Also, it is important to pay attention to your body. Does your heart race or do you get sweaty in certain situations (I mean, other than physical exercise)? Do you feel yourself getting tense when entering certain environments?

Being aware of your dreams may also help you discover if there is an underlying fear getting in the way of your life. Are you having a lot of nightmares? Do you remember feeling anxious or upset in your dreams? Any common themes popping up?

Pay attention and be on the alert for if you have fear in your life.

Step 2: Uncover the reason for the fear

Many times the real reason behind fear isn’t what you think it is at first glance. There may be some underlying reason that exists that you need to uncover in order to move beyond it. Are you afraid of loosing your job? Why would it be bad to lose that job? Is it because you wouldn’t have enough money to get by – or any other options – or are you really afraid of what your mother would think?

Uncovering the real reason for the fear will help you to realize what you need to do to move beyond that fear – or if you are even ready to let go of that fear. The best way to uncover this may be to talk it out with someone who you trust. If that isn’t an option, journaling is a great way. Let yourself free flow and just have a conversation with yourself, asking questions and answering them. Don’t try to censor yourself – you can always throw away the paper after you are done.

Step 3: Confront the fear

Once you uncover what is at the root of your fear, it is time to confront that fear – or to realize that you are not ready to do so and that this fear is something you are willing to live with for now. Either option is valid and it is up to you to decide what to do.

Confronting the fear depends on what is causing this fear. It may be that just realizing that it is there is enough to release it or you may need to reshape the way you think and make decisions. 

Personally, I have found that when I uncover a source of fear, learning more about it is a way for me to release it – knowledge is power right!  The fears I have been working on lately may seem a little silly, but I suspect they are rather widespread. For example, I used to have a fear of ghosts. Sounds kind of silly for a psychic, but something that I have found is ingrained in us culturally from childhood. The shows my five-year-old watches teachers her that ghosts are something to be afraid of – a message I am working on correcting. 

So, in order to overcome this fear, I took to reading about ghosts and what they actually are. I uncovered that there are a variety of theories and many of these are just different dimensional abnormalities. Since that point, I now do not have a fear of ghost and am more comfortable with the concept. 

What fears do you have that you want to work on? What is blocking you from accomplishing everything you would like to accomplish in your life?

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